Well well well...look what the cat dragged in. Me. And about 25 lbs lighter with a side of sweet little babieness named Emmaline hope. Heaven, in a wrinkly, toothless package. Its taken me awhile to get back into the groove of things, but I think I'm back, more motivated than before, and ready to start some new adventures. For starters, I'm making bread today. For the first time in about 5 months probably. I can't even remember honestly. My garden disaster was a big downer for me, as well as being pregnant and not really enjoying any moment of that. But, now that my new munchkin is laying beside me asleep and the yeast is foaming in a bowl in the kitchen...life feels good again. Sophia has been such a big help. She is thoroughly in love with our new addition. Although she still wants lots of attention, she is more than willing to give some to her new baby. She has helped with diaper changing and bathtime. I even pumped some milk into a bottle so she could see what it was like to feed her. The look on her face was like she had an electrical charge running through her whole body. Pretty sure I could have marched a pink, sparkly pony into the livingroom at that moment and she wouldn't have noticed. I knew she'd be great. I went along with everyone's worries for her and nodded as they talked about jealousy and poor Sophia, but she is a different kind of person. She is old in her ways sometimes. Its odd and sometimes I wonder what I'm supposed to be doing as her parent. I know that I don't do enough to challenge her or support her. She is just so smart and grounded that its hard to know what I need to do. I fear that Emmaline may be the same way. I'm already getting some serious looks like I did with Sophia. Children are odd. They have everything they need to learn about the world all wrapped up in one little package just waiting for parents to open them up. Its my job to show her the world in a way that will help her become an even better adult than she is as a child. But, what do you do with someone who is probably already smarter and more grounded than you are. What kid says "I'm only misbehaving because I'm bored"??? She knows why she misbehaves...Ask me again why I'm scared to be her mother. My answer, because I'm afraid that I'm not good enough for her. But damned if I won't die trying to show her how amazing she is and what she's capable of.
Another tidbit of good news...I'm typing this on my "new to me" laptop, which I bought from a friend. As much as I love my mornings in the office with the sun coming through the blinds, typing out in my garden, on the front porch, at the park, or from the sofa...as I am right now, is far more motivating.
So my goals for this winter...
-More time with Sophia doing crazy projects like our current one "milk carton bird feeders" (pics coming soon)
-Rejoin MaryJane's Farmgirls and earn some crafty lady badges
-Host once a month craft parties and introduce some other fine ladies to MaryJane's Farmgirls
-Plan a more simplified garden for 2012
-Work on our debt situation. I have joined a small discussion group with friends and we're all working on our problems together. Success in numbers, right?
-Make almost all of our Christmas gifts
-Make a secret plan to become a SAHM, hide it from hubby, and work on debt situation to make that happen.
-Be a better blog host. I like you, blog. I'm sorry I ignored you for so long. I'm aiming for once a week or every other week.
Peace. Love. And poopy diapers. I'm out!
